Get Into Satan

Religion isn't always hearts and flowers
I tried being a Jehovah's witness but I didn't like the hours
Moslems can turn nasty and who needs the C of E
I've finally found the perfect faith for me.

Come on throw off your hats and coats
Get naked now and shag some goats for Satan
Some folks dream of paradise
Although that might be nice don't bother waitin'
Come on and join our horny throng
After all what's wrong copulatin'
If deeds are dirty get them done
Satanism can be fun
The next time that you see a nun
Start masturbatin'.

We'll never knock on doors while you're asleep
We're always far too busy buggering sheep and buggering sheep
And here's the major reason that we never need to moan
We'll never get Cliff Richard on the phone.

No more buts, no more ifs
Get out your spades, dig up some stiffs for Satan
Drown some kittens buy a gun
Think of all the fun you'll be creatin'
Well being nasty is a treat
And being sweet is always so frustratin'
Now here's a trick that you can try
I've got a chainsaw you can buy
When folks raise their hands to testify
Start amputatin'.

Come on down the devil's path
Drop a three bar fire in grandma's bath for Satan
Each task you can perform with ease
'Cos poaching OAPs is fascinatin'
Hit the vodka, hit the gin
I know you'll find that sin is scintilllatin'
Don't be godly be a slob
Smack your vicar in the gob
Yessireee, Beelzebub
Get into Satan.

(The devil is my shepherd, and boy do I love the sheep.)